Express: Pow! Biff! Wow!

I'm not really the superhero sort, but I'm married to H1, which means I've seen pretty much all the superhero movies that have come out in the last few years. Spiderman with Tobey Maguire? Seen all of them. Batman? Yes, of course, even if I didn't quite remember seeing the first of the latest lot and H1 had to talk me through the plot while I ummed and ahed (I think I saw it.) The Avengers? Uh-huh, and the stand-alone Iron Man movies as well. Spiderman with Andrew Garfield? No. Lines have to be drawn somewhere, and for me it's when they remake a movie a mere ten years after a perfectly fine attempt was last done. Even though I do adore Emma Stone, and would make an effort to see a Wal-Mart commercial if she was in it. So with that 'fessed, I have a secret...

My ‘I have a secret’ face.

This dress is a superhero dress.

A superhero dress is different from a superhero costume. We can all be relieved about that, because there's no way I could pull off skintight leather* the way Anne Hathaway did as Catwoman, or Scarlett Johansson did as whatsherface** in Avengers. I don't even think Iron Man's suit would work for me - everyone would be pointing at my chest and muttering about how it's obviously fake. The Hulk, maybe...

But I don't need to worry about it, because I don't need a superhero costume, and neither do you, probably. You DO need a superhero dress, though. This is different from what I wrote about a little while ago. A superhero dress isn't necessarily one that makes you feel invincible (although if it does, all the better). A superhero dress is a superhero in its own right.

This is my full superhero dress:

The superhero dress in all its glory.

And this is why it's a superhero.

  1. Versatility. In the above photo, it was uncommonly warm for North Carolina at the end of November, so I rolled the sleeves up a little. In summer, I do the same and lose the leggings. In winter, I put a collared shirt underneath, with French cuffs sticking out the end of the sleeves. I wrap a belt around it sometimes, or, if I'm planning on eating a lot or I've been slacking on the Pilates classes, I leave the belt off and enjoy the '60s shift effect. It can be dressed up or down. If I am wearing leggings, I can wear it in the office. It is almost always appropriate.
  2. Ease. It doesn't need ironing. It's made of quite a heavy cotton, and any wrinkles just fall out with gravity after wearing it for a few minutes. It doesn't need anything underneath, or over it, to make it decent (other than the standard underpinnings, of course). It is black and cream. I'm yet to work out what it doesn't go with in my wardrobe.
  3. Comfort. It is like wearing pyjamas, but without the crazy lady connotations.

I would say that if you don't own a superhero dress, to go out and buy one stat, but they're not something you can find everywhere. You have to wait for them to come into your life. Hopefully, like real superheroes***, they'll do that just when you need them the most.

I found this one in a J.Crew in a charming town in Connecticut, of all places. I didn't buy it immediately, mostly because buying anything from J.Crew in Connecticut is an act designed to make you feel like the world's biggest cliché, but I did buy it (yeah, I'll show you, CT J.Crew). I've since seen it multiple times in other J.Crews, in different colourways and designs (the blue version with the sweet little anchor came very close to moving in with me not long ago). What is truly amazing, though, is that I've never seen it on anyone else. Because it is a superhero dress, you see.

I'm just going to end with the obvious. When you see a superhero wall...

That parking sign’s pretty super too. $5 parking is mythical in New York.

...make sure you're wearing a superhero dress.

Shazam! Dress: J.Crew, glasses, Ray-Ban, bag, Kate Spade.

*How DO they take that off? Remember in Friends, when Ross got his leather pants stuck? And made paste pants? Is it like that? Now that I've ruined your enjoyment of envisioning beautiful women taking off leather (I am going to have fun checking out what Google searches have brought people here in the next few days, aren't I?), I'll stop.

**Arbitrary and mostly redundant sexy woman, I think was her name.

***There's an oxymoron for you.